I Went to CVS to Pick up My Prescription and Left with The Last Multi-pack of Charmin.

By Stephanie Lancaster (Written in Writing Class Radio’s Weekly Writer’s Group)

Yesterday, I left my house for the first time in 10 days to go to CVS to pick up a refill on a prescription. I was planning to use the pharmacy drive-through, but when I got to the store, the line of cars was long, so I parked, put my mask on, and went into the store. 

I was distracted by the makeup aisle - I need a new lipstick that will make me look less pale and tired on the Zoom calls. Once I had that magic elixir in hand, I proceeded toward the pharmacy counter.

The hair products - particularly those on the end-cap next to a sign that said, Big, sexy hair! - lulled me away from my intended path. This mousse will for sure make me look better on a Zoom call- even my limp ponytail will look better with some BODY.

Determined to make it to the pharmacy counter, I forged on with those two sleight-of-hand products in my arms. Without even slowing my roll, I reached out and grabbed a bag of shelled pistachio nuts in the snack aisle and a new pack of highlighter markers from the school supply section. These will help my productivity for sure.

Two aisles away from my mark, I became consumed by a thought: WHAT IF I RUN OUT OF TOILET PAPER? 

I felt a magnetic pull toward the home goods section and once again deviated, this time picking up THE LAST multi-pack of Charmin Ultra Soft Mega Roll Ultra Gentle TP and then running a victory lap around the perimeter of the store. A CVS employee caught my eye and waved me towards the check-out line; there was orange tape on the floor at points 6-feet away from each other to facilitate social distancing while customers waited in line to check out. God DAMN I'm killing it today, I thought as I noticed there was nobody in line. 

I put my catch of the day on the counter, paid, accepted the two bags handed to me by the cashier, and then doused myself with hand sanitizer on my way out the door. With a smile of what I assume was self-satisfaction on my face, I got into my car, sanitized again for good measure, took off the face mask, and drove the two miles back to my house. I unloaded the car, went inside, and, as I considered putting on the lipstick I'd just bought, it dawned on me that I'd left without getting my prescription.

Stephanie Lancaster is an occupational therapist and an assistant professor in the Department of Occupational Therapy at the University of Tennessee Health Science Center in Memphis, TN. She hosts a podcast called On The air (www.OnTheair.us) for individuals interested in occupational therapy.